You're my problem
by murtaghxblaiseyum
Summary: Sam's not eating or sleeping and Dean wants to know what Sam's problem is, Sams problem is that he loves Dean. WARNINGS Wincest, Slash


Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Your stunning green eyes light up as the waitress brings you, your order of double bacon cheese burger and fries, you give a small smile of thanks before you bit into the juicy hunk of meat before you, I hear a soft sigh of appreciation escape your lips as you savour the taste.

I see the muscles in your elegant neck contract as you shallow that well deserved first bite, you look at me as if to say 'This is Heaven' but you see the expression on my face before I can mask it.

I see the lines on your brow appear which expresses to me that your either worried or fed up, how I hate those lines, In the last couple of years I have seen them on your beautiful face too many times to count.

"Something up with your salad, Sam" Your voice sings into the space between us, soft yet dangerous, no wonder you have never had trouble picking up women, with your Adonis like physique, honed over the years with hunting, Looks that even the likes of Narcissus would fall in love with and be jealous of, Eyes that shine with the colour of emeralds and lips that people only dream of having, A classic car that dealers salivate over and a voice which the church would swear the angels sounded like, it sent shivers down the spine of anyone that heard it, including me.

"No, I'm just not Hungary I guess" it was only half a lie, I was Hungary but not for food, I was Hungary for him.

"You guess, You guess, Sam you have been like this for days, Not eating, Hardly Sleeping and not even talking as much as you should, this is one of the reasons I've dragged you out, Something is obviously wrong, You know I just want to help, I'm your big brother Sam, and being a Big brother means knowing something is up and helping the little brother out, So what's wrong?"

I couldn't tell him everything that I had been thinking over the last few months, in fact years but they had been becoming unbearable over the last three months or so.

I couldn't tell him that him being my brother was the problem, I didn't want his help, I wanted him sweaty and above me, I wanted our bodies joined, no skin left untouched or untasted, I wanted his lips on mine, I wanted my lips on all of him.

But I couldn't tell him.

Dean wasn't like me, he loved the curves of a woman and not the abs of a man, He would hate me for be the freak who loved his own brother the same way a person loved a partner or lover, so I did the only think I thought I could do, I lied.

"I just can't get over the fact the angels have all fallen" In a way it was true, I still was trying to wrap my head around that fact that there was no more angels in heaven, they where all walking around the earth as mortals now. I was thankful that Castiel had survived the fall which some angels had not, I was thankful that he had the brains to ring us, we had found him and took him back to the Bat cave where he was slowly becoming used to the fact that he was now fully human and had to do things the hard way now.

"Sam, that's a lie and I know it, yeah its shocking but we can't do anything about it, You forget that I know your when your lying because you're my little brother"

There it was again, Brother, it meant family, friendship, platonic love and rivalry, but to me it meant taboo, forbidden, wrong, it meant I was a freak of nature in more ways then one. Brother it reverberated around my skull haunting me, teasing me until I couldn't take it anymore, the proverbial Dam broke.

"Maybe that's the problem Dean, Maybe you being my Brother is problem" I couldn't believe I had said it, it was like word vomit that I couldn't stop, spewing from my mouth to ruin my life.

I jumped up and began to run out of the tiny diner in shock, I saw out of the corner of my eye as I open the door, Dean throw notes on the table before following me, As I raced across the asphalt river I thought how stupid I'd been, why couldn't I have just shut up, I went into the woods hoping to lose him in the vast haze of trees. I would have had a chance before he went into purgatory with my longer legs and slightly better stamina, But the year in there made him a skilled tracker and all the fighting he had to do in there made his stamina shoot though the roof.

I kept running with him close of my heels, I was growing short of breathe and much to my dismay I started to slow down, he managed to catch me in a clearing when I had almost ran out of energy.

"Sam, stop" He didn't even seem out of breathe like me, Guess running and fighting for your life all day, everyday does wonders for you physically.

I thought as I panted to catch my breathe back, I still had my back turned to him.

I thought of how today was going to be the day he would hate me forever or maybe even possibly kill me in this deserted clearing for be even more of a freak the he thought originally, I could see the headline now 'Winchester kills his Homosexual, Incestuous, Demon blood ex junkie, Satanic vessel, physic Brother"

"What Dean" I put of a brave face as I turned to face him although I was shaking inside, he marched closer until we were only a few feet a part.

"What was that about?, What did you mean by me being your brother was your problem?"

I knew there was no way out of this but I had to have a shot of keeping him from hating me.

"Just leave it Dean, as you said it's my problem, Lets just go home"

Home, it's a funny word because to everyone it has a different meaning, to most people home is a two up, two down pile of bricks and mortar, But to us in our childhood the Impala was home, it was the one thing in our life that was never changing, Always there, It didn't have things like beds and bathrooms like houses or motels he had stayed in but it had the memories that stayed with us forever, It was the place I realised I first loved Dean as more then a brother, I Looked across at him when we was driving and I realised then that he was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with however long or short it may be.

But the home I was referring to was the Bat cave , The command centre and Head Quarters of the men of letters, our legacy, a place that we could finally call our own.

"NO!, Is it because you hate me Sam, Are you fed up of being around me, fed up of hunting again, do you want to leave is that it?" I could hear the hurt in his voice it clutched at my heart,

I could never hate him, regardless of if he hates me after this.

"No Dean, Its because I love you, That's my Problem, you're my brother and I Love you, I'm in love with you, I've ignored it for years but lately it's getting to me and it wont go away, believe me I've tried to make it, I've tried it with Jessica, Madison, Ruby and countless men even but it won't disappear how ever hard I try, You can hate me now but It wont stop me loving you!"

I had said it, I had said what I had been holding back for years, scared to say in fear he would hate me, I feel the tears well up in my eyes and make tracks across my cheeks, I feel my heart prepare it's self to shatter. 'Silence' It was worse then him shouting or throwing punches because their was no indication of his emotions, I continued to stare at the ground because I couldn't force my self to see the disgust on his face, I Should waiting for him to do what ever it was he was going to do, I heard his foot steps, I closed my eyes tight as I thought he was leaving when I felt his fingers on my chin gently tilting my face up till I was looking at him.

"Sammy" His voice was as soft as cotton candy, it made me have hope "Why didn't you tell me this before?" I looked into his eyes and saw love, it might not be the kind I'm after but I would take it if it meant he didn't hate like I thought he would.

"I thought you would hate me" I whispered

"I could never hate you and if you had told me earlier, I could have done this before" I didn't have time to process the though of what he meant, I felt his perfect lips pressed against mine, I tensed for a moment before I realised what was happing and then I responded with gusto, I felt his fingers work their way into my hair as I pulled his body closer to mine, soft yet hard at the same time just like I had dreamed of, I felt his tongue lick its way across my lips begging for entrance, I gladly accepted my opening them and letting his velvet tongue caress mine, Normally I hate red meat but the faint hint of his last meal tasted like heaven, I took a deep inhale though my nose, I could smell his unique scent, it smelt of Gasoline, Gun power and pine trees with a musk that was most defiantly Dean.

We pulled away after a time, I could have been five minutes or an hour, I don't know but I still felt a little shocked but the little smile he gave as he held me close made my heart sing.

"Just to clarify, I've been in love with you for years as well, but like you I was scared you would hate me" I stared into his eyes and realised that the love I saw earlier in them was the love I wanted after all.

I felt like I was flying because I Loved Him and He Loved Me!

/

All Reviews welcome :D


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